Clarity
by hifield
Summary: Sometimes the realization of attraction comes from the mundane and ordinary events in life.  In response to the may challenge, Love of Flying, on the GW forum Team Flyboys.


Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Stargate Atlantis or the awesome characters but I enjoy keeping the series alive.

Author Notes: This story is for all the gang over on Gateworld's _Team Flyboy_ forum in answer to the May challenge _Love of Flying_.

Thanks so much to bailey1ak for the quick read… all mistakes are mine.

_I appreciate your reviews and look forward to your feedback._

Clarity

Sheppard paced the control room waiting for the gate to engage. Teyla was overdue which was very out of character even if the Tendol Feast lasted well into the night. He knew she'd have her radio nearby so hopefully it was just a matter of over sleeping.

Watching the chevrons lock into place John thought back to their departure. Jennifer was accompanying Teyla to New Athos to meet the Athosians and hold a small clinic. Still unaccustomed to gate travel he could see the uncertainty in her eyes as he'd bid them goodbye. Now as he waited to make contact he hoped it was just a case of too much Ruus wine.

"Teyla? This is Atlantis, do you read?" Sheppard inquired once the wormhole had stabilized.

Rodney and Ronon looked on with concern listening as the Colonel tried to establish radio contact

"Teyla, this is Sheppard, come in."

"She wouldn't turn off her radio," McKay stated anxiously.

"No, she wouldn't," Ronon growled.

"Calling anyone in the Athosian settlement. This is Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard. Do you copy?"

Worry began to etch his face as an all too familiar feeling of dread began crawling up his spine reminding him that nothing is easy in the Pegasus galaxy.

"Teyla, this is Sheppard. Please respond," he called again knowing something wasn't right. "Gear up," he ordered the men. Making eye contact with Colonel Carter he saw her give her nod of approval as the men quickly made their way to the armory.

The tension was thick as the jumper lowered into the gate room. No one spoke as each man envisioned the village and the fastest way to approach unnoticed.

"Good luck Colonel, bring our people home," Carter urged before ordering Chuck to shut down the gate.

Sheppard cloaked the jumper as soon as they arrived on New Athos. Getting a good look at the strange warriors guarding the ancestral ring, he turned to Ronon hoping for some insight.

"Those guys guarding the Gate certainly don't look Athosian," Sheppard stated as they flew above the trees.

"They're Bola Kai," Ronon announced. "It's a warrior tribe. Ruthless. They like picking fights, especially with travelers who are peaceful."

Finding it hard to pinpoint life signs through the thick forest Sheppard looked for a clearing to safely land the jumper. Continuing on foot the team followed Ronon through the woods as they swiftly headed toward a group of life signs hoping their choice of directions paid off with a speedy rescue.

Nearing a large group of warriors the men began firing taking out those in their way as they ran through the trees. The Bola Kai began a hasty retreat as more of their comrades fell under the superior weapons fire.

As the men came into the small clearing they found Teyla and Dr. Keller and quickly checked to see that the women were okay just as the enemy launched another attack, firing arrows from all directions. Ronon grabbed Jennifer's arm and speedily moved both women toward the jumper as Sheppard and Rodney laid down cover fire.

"Is everyone okay?" Sheppard asked hearing the ramp close behind them.

"We are fine Colonel," Teyla answered as she surveyed the group. Sheppard's team took their usual places with Teyla behind Rodney who occupied the co-pilot seat and Ronon behind Sheppard with his legs sprawled out in the aisle. Teyla looked to Jennifer in the rear of the jumper receiving a small nod of assurance before the doctor settled herself leaning against the bulkhead with her sprained leg stretched out on the bench before she buried her head in her on her one drawn up knee.

Jen could feel the adrenalin rush losing its power as she sat working through all the emotions. As the ship made its approach to the open wormhole Jennifer began an uncontrollable slide show in her mind of the past two days. By the time they'd arrived in the hanger bay she was dealing with a full blown panic attack.

When the ramp hit the floor the team moved toward the exit. Ronon hesitated when Jennifer failed to leave her seat on the bench but continued once Sheppard indicated with a nod that he'd deal with the doctor.

"Hey Doc we're here … let me help you to the infirmary," Sheppard quietly spoke while gently shaking her shoulder. When he didn't get a response he knelt down beside the bench to get a better look at her, "Doc, … you okay?"

Jennifer was vaguely aware that someone was calling her. She was doing all she could to hold it together but failing miserably. She could still see the hideous faces and feel the foul smelling breath of her enemy on the back of her neck as he pinned her against the tent post running his filthy hands over her body threatening unspeakable things if she didn't give them the information they wanted … "who are you and where did you come from?" She didn't think she'd ever been that terrified before.

Raising her head she registered Colonel Sheppard kneeling beside her and threw herself into his chest clinging to him as best she could with her limited mobility as the sobs finally found their release.

Unprepared for her response to his voice Sheppard barely had time to keep himself from falling backwards. Having been through numerous tight situations himself he hadn't given much thought to how unprepared she was for the ordeal she'd just been through. Come to think of it, he had very few details as to what the women had endured waiting for their rescue.

Jennifer had a firm grip on the Colonel's tac vest assuring herself that she was safe as she released all the fear and helplessness she'd been holding in. "I'm so sorry … I'm so sorry," she kept mumbling.

"You're safe now … there's nothing to be sorry for," he assured her. Sheppard felt at a loss on how to comfort her. This certainly wasn't his area of expertise but he wanted to help her reach that place of release where she'd stopped blaming herself and look at the situation for what it was … bad timing. The Colonel took hold of her arms and gently pushed her away until he could see her face, which wasn't an easy feat seeing as the woman had a death hold on his vest. "Doc … look at me," he instructed waiting for her to fully concentrate on what he was saying. "You didn't do anything wrong and you're safe. Dr. Cole is taking care of Teyla and she's fine. I need to get you to the infirmary so someone can look at your leg."

"Not yet … I'm not ready. I don't want anyone to touch me … I was so scared," she said barely above a whisper.

Listening to the doctor's ramblings Sheppard found his anger bubbling to the surface. He wanted to know what happened on that planet. He'd never had to deal with the Bola Kai before but planned on stopping by Ronon's quarters as soon as Jennifer was settled in the infirmary. Hopefully the Satedan could shed some light on the whole situation. "Doc, move over a bit," he asked shifting himself next to her on the bench. As soon as he was situated in the corner with his bulky vest on the floor he put his arm around her pulling her closer. "Take your time Doc, we'll leave whenever you're ready."

"Thanks … if Teyla hadn't been with me I wouldn't have made it. It's my fault she's hurt," she tried to explain.

Sheppard watched Marie slowly approach the back of the jumper looking for Atlantis' missing CMO. He made eye contact giving a small shake of his head to let her know that this was a bad time. He was grateful to see Marie acknowledge him with an understanding nod.

"I shot a man today."

Sheppard gave her shoulders a small squeeze of comfort knowing this wasn't the time for words. He knew she didn't expect an answer … she just needed to voice it out loud. He leaned his head back again the cold metal wall of the jumper closing his eyes while he thought about all the horrible things that might have happened. He might not have been Jennifer's direct superior but he was responsible for the safety of everyone in the expedition and would do everything possible to see she came out of this stronger and at peace.

Jennifer cried herself dry leaving the Colonel with a soaked shirt as evidence of her melt down. With a heavy sigh, she sat up wiping her eyes and fussing for a few minutes with her disheveled hair. "Thank you Colonel … I think I'm ready but you might have to help me. I think my ankle is broken."

"You'll get through this Jennifer," he promised helping her stand up.

"That's what Teyla kept saying … I hope you're both right."

Sheppard helped her hobble to the infirmary although it might have been easier just to carry her but he wanted to help her hold on to her ragged sense of pride as she entered into her domain. She appeared to be in complete control but he knew she was hanging by a thread.

He kept a close eye on the two women the rest of the week assuring himself they were making progress and healing both inside and out. By the end of the month he was satisfied with their recovery. In the process he'd become closer to Jennifer and wondered about the new relationship they'd forged.

oOo

It was a late Friday night, the end of her shift, and Jennifer sat at her desk staring at the stacks of paperwork that still needed to be completed and filed. She sat and wondered if she'd be considered lazy if she requested a personal assistant with the next batch of recruits. She'd been granted a short leave to go see her dad for a few days after the encounter with the Bola Kai but just couldn't get herself caught up enough to feel comfortable leaving even if it was just for a short time. Colonel Sheppard had helped her through a few bad times and talking to Teyla had helped immensely. Feeling the warmth of her father's arms hugging her deeply sounded so inviting but her Lantean family was taking good care of her making sure she healed properly.

Feeling her head start to pound from too many hours and too little food she put her head down on her desk to rest her eyes for just a few moments.

"Hey sleepyhead," Sheppard called shaking her gently.

"What … ergggg I fell asleep again!

"Come on, I'll walk you home."

She made short time of closing down her computer and locking her files away. Once the lights were off and the door locked she joined the Colonel heading for the exit. "As much as I appreciate the chivalry, I really should grab a sandwich in the mess hall … I'm pretty sure I skipped dinner. And … I'm sure you have more important things to attend to."

"Hush … I could use some coffee so we'll sit and eat together and then I'll walk you home."

Jennifer knew better than to argue with a military man who was set on a course of action. Besides, she really enjoyed his company.

Settling her growling stomach with a sandwich and cup of hot tea Jen sat with the Colonel enjoying the gentle breeze on the balcony.

"I love this time of night," she sighed. "It always seems so peaceful once the lights have been dimmed and most everyone is tucked in their quarters for the day."

"I enjoy wandering through the city when it's quiet … easier to find beautiful women sleeping in their offices and escort them home."

"So is it the big bad wolf role model you tend to follow or more along the lines of a southern gentleman practicing what his mama taught him?" she asked laughing.

"Depends on the beautiful woman," he answered wiggling his eyebrows. "Come on, its time to get you home … I've seen those yawns you've been trying to hide for the last hour."

The two of them slowly made their way along the hallways heading toward the crew quarters quietly discussing odd friendships and alliances Atlantis had acquired over the past year. The Pegasus truly was an impressive galaxy whichever way you choose to look at it and she couldn't image living anywhere else.

Arriving at her quarters, Sheppard waited until she opened her door before bidding her goodnight.

"Are you done for the night?" she asked sternly trying not to grin. "As your physician I must insist on you spending some quality time in bed … alone," she added seeing the beginnings of a suggestive grin fill his face.

"I have one more stop to make before my night's over. I usually check Rodney's lab before calling it done. Man has a way of pushing his limits."

"So its not just beautiful women you prowl the halls for at night?" she challenged.

"I need him rested … and I never walk him home," he smirked arching an eyebrow. "Good night Doc," he added, smiling as he turned to take his leave.

oOo

Today was a busy one in the infirmary with the Daedalus docked on the east pier. Jennifer had a steady stream of recruits in and out all day. Thankfully most of the teams were on base making the load in the clinic much lighter. Sheppard's team was the only one off-world … they'd been giving aid to a planet that'd just recently been devastated by the Wraith and stayed an extra day to help build a large shelter.

Jennifer ushered her next patient to the area she'd been working in directing him to sit on the empty bed. The young Marine couldn't have been more than a few months out of basic training but then again she was often mistaken for a college student so she may be way off on her assessment.

"Good afternoon Corporal, I have a few basic tests and a simple exam to perform … shouldn't take but a few minutes," she explained strapping a blood pressure cup around his arm.

"How long have you been here Doc?" he asked nervously.

"Well, I guess it's been about two years now … maybe a bit longer. Time seems to fly by," she chuckled. "Is this your first combat situation?"

"Yes, Ma'am. It feels a lot … different … in person. Have you seen much combat?" he inquired looking a bit unsure of himself.

"Look soldier, I'm sure it all feels a bit overwhelming right now but give yourself time. We have an excellent training staff … they'll make sure you're combat ready before sending you through the gate. In the mean time you'll get used to our routines and life in this galaxy. We take good care of our own out here so you have nothing to worry about," she encouraged, thankful he showed signs of relaxing a bit. She knew how overwhelming the Pegasus could be to a newcomer. The Corporal seemed like a sweet, unpretentious Marine, which was hard to find in the military men that came through her infirmary. Hopefully she wouldn't have to recommend his return to Earth.

As they were finishing up his exam Jennifer got the call for a medical team to the gate room. "Do we need a gurney?" she asked over the radio link. After hearing negative to her inquiry she turned to instruct her patient, "Sorry Corporal, I'm needed elsewhere … I'll have Dr. Cole finish your exam." With that said, she grabbed her bags and hurried out the door.

The team was just coming through the gate as she arrived with Marie at her side. "Colonel, what happened?"

"Had the side of a building come down on us. Chewy took the brunt of it … has quite a knot on the back of his head and was out for maybe an hour."

"I'm fine," he growled.

Jennifer hit an icepack with the palm of her hand activating it before handing it to Ronon. The Satedan placed it on the back of his head frowning but following her instructions.

"I seemed to have ripped up my thigh from a row of nails sticking out of a window frame," Sheppard added.

"Okay … both of you follow me. How are you Teyla?" she asked as they group moved down the corridors toward the infirmary. "And where is Dr. McKay?"

"I am fine … I was not in the area when the wall collapsed. Rodney was at the far end of the settlement working with their scientist when the accident occurred, I'm sure he will be back soon," Teyla explained.

The young Marine was just heading toward the infirmary exit when Sheppard's team arrived. His eyes widen watching the men hobble in still dressed in full combat gear.

"We're a little swamped here today," Jennifer stated directing Ronon to the nearest open bed while helping Teyla with the Colonel.

"Corporal … a little help here," Sheppard called gaining the new recruit's attention.

"Yes sir," he answered moving to stand stiffly at his commanding officer's side.

"At ease son … what's your name?"

"Lance Corporal Howard Stark sir, my friends call me Howie," he said kicking himself for offering such personal information.

"Well, _Howie_, I need you to take our gear to the armory for us … think you can find your way?"

"Yes sir,"

Sheppard unclipped his P-90 handing it to the Corporal along with his tac vest. Nodding toward Teyla the recruit took her weapon and vest too then moved toward Ronon reaching out for his pistol.

"Did you just hiss at Corporal Howard?" Jen demanded of Ronon. "I'm sure you know better than to hiss at me," she began indignantly staring at him with her hands on her hips.

"Sorry Doc, I think it's my head injury," he grinned knowing she couldn't resist his charm.

"Corporal, Ronon will take care of his own weapon … sometimes he forgets his manners." With her back to her patient she failed to see the evil glare Ronon shot at the young man.

After pointing the Corporal in the right direction Jennifer turned back to Ronon but he wasn't quick enough at wiping the scowl off his face. Realizing he'd been intimidating the poor kid behind her back she smacked him in the shoulder.

"Come on Doc … I have a reputation to maintain," he justified looking for a little sympathy.

"Well, now you've scared the hooy out of him," she complained.

"The what?"

"Never mind … just go easy on him during training. I'd like to see him give Atlantis a chance."

"How would you classify this one?" John asked.

"Frightens easily but worth keeping around … now let's take a look at your leg."

She worked on the men stitching up Sheppard's wound and settling Ronon in for the night after running a scan. She insisted on keeping Ronon for at least 12 hours and promised if he was still awake she'd send him back to his quarters.

The doctor shooed everyone out of the infirmary before grabbing Sheppard and Ronon's files to stash on her desk so she wouldn't mix them up with the new recruit records. Closing John's file she caught a glimpse of his personal information and opened it again curious about his birth date. Skimming through the information she found what she was looking for and jotted down the information on a sticky note in the top of her desk. He had a birthday coming up and she knew the perfect gift … if she could get it here in time.

After treating several scientists and cleaning up her work area Jennifer left for the dining hall to get herself something to eat. She sat with her tray in the far end of the crowded mess hall starring out the window as the sky darkened for the night.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Howie asked.

"Take a seat Corporal … I'd love the company."

The two visited about their homes back on Earth along with likes and dislikes they shared. It was a pleasant meal and Jennifer soon found herself hiding how tired she was.

"Did you get settled in?" she asked the Corporal.

"Yes … took a quick look-see around the main building. This place is amazing."

"I'm glad you feel that way … you should give it all a chance … I think you'll like it here," she encouraged.

"I talked to a few of the guys and they mentioned that Ronon is our training instructor … is that right?" he asked nervously.

"He's one of the men in charge of training. Major Lorne and Teyla also train and even Colonel Sheppard at times."

"Hope he doesn't hold the gun thing against me," he mumbled.

"You'll do fine. Ronon is an excellent teacher … best trainer we have and he takes it very seriously … you shouldn't worry."

Jennifer was enjoying their conversation and found it refreshing to share a meal with a new recruit who wasn't full of himself. It usually took a session or two with Ronon before some of the recruits started acting more civilized. _Speaking of_ … she thought to herself as she watched a couple of Marines swagger toward her table.

"Hey _Howie_, why don't you introduce us to your friend?" the Sergeant suggested as he took a seat uninvited.

"Why don't you guys find another table … we were just finishing." Howard said sternly.

"Maybe the pretty lady isn't ready to leave," the Lieutenant suggested. "I'm Lt. Dawson … Clive Dawson. And you are?" he asked while extending his hand.

"Dr. Keller," she answered coolly.

Sheppard shuffled into the mess hall on his crutches looking over the food choices in the heated bins. After filling his tray he looked to the dining area to see who might come to his rescue. Spotting Jennifer sitting with a couple of strange Marines he felt an odd sensation creep up his spine … jealously… he hadn't felt anything like this for a long time. _Maybe its just concern that she's being bothered by newbies,_ he thought to himself. After watching her for a few minutes to see if she was enjoying their company he decided she was just being polite and decided to join her. The cook picked his tray up offering a helping hand and the two headed off across the room.

Jennifer spotted John across the room and shot up a silent prayer he'd rescue her. If she had to listen to these two jarheads one up each other one more minute she was sure she'd say something regrettable.

As John approached the table he could see her heave a visible sigh of relief. Setting his tray down beside the doctor he greeted the men seated around the table. After a few minutes of introductions he felt it was time to break up this little party.

"Well boys, I'm afraid I'm going to have to put my leg up … doctor's orders and all. Hope you don't mind but I'll need to stretch out," he explained hoping they'd take the hint. Howie was the first to stand thanking Jennifer for her company.

"Sit Corporal, you're not in the way," John invited. He was starting to take a liking to the young Marine.

The other two men were rather thick and instead of politely leaving the table they chose to scrunch up on the other side of the table so they didn't have to move … feeling like they'd scored a major hoo-rah to sit at the same table with their commanding officer. Besides, if Howie didn't have to leave then they certainly weren't going to budge.

Sheppard took up one side of the table with Jennifer sitting next to him at the head when Teyla arrived taking a seat on the other side catty-corner to Jen. The men were quick to make introductions to the Athosian beauty and vied for her attention. Next Lorne showed up squeezing between Teyla and the new kids pushing Howie closer to Sheppard's extended leg. Again, introductions were made just as Rodney joined the group.

"This is Rodney McKay, head of the science department," Lorne began making a half-hearted effort to introduce the new Marines.

"Don't bother … already forgotten your names," McKay said matter of factly pulling a chair from the table behind him and shoving himself between the men and Lorne. With so little space the Marines were forced to slide their chairs back a ways from the table all the while sneering at the scientist.

Soon the conversation moved around the table with Teyla giving details about their earlier mission and John receiving the bulk of the teasing. Howie was enjoying the camaraderie between the teammates; wisely choosing to keep his mouth shut and just savor the moment. The same couldn't be said for his comrades who tried to interject little snippets here and there about their own experiences.

Just as things became a bit awkward Ronon arrived with a huge tray of food. Moving to the end of the table he glared at the Marines expecting them to jump. When that didn't happen he was forced to speak.

"Looks like you're done," he growled to the strangers at the table. Looking across to Jennifer he quickly assured her that Marie told him to go get something to eat.

"Thanks for the company," Howie said standing up to make room.

"You can stay," Ronon pronounced as he set his tray down in front of Lt. Dawson. Reaching to the back of Dawson's chair he made it clear he was expected to leave along with his buddy. It was good to know that the men were not completely clueless as they stood to leave.

"I should probably leave too or I'm liable to fall asleep right here at the table."

"We don't mind," Sheppard teased. Reaching over he grabbed hold of her chair leg and scooted it closer to his chair.

"Now you have a pillow," he offered patting his shoulder.

Looking across the table Jennifer could see the Corporal grinning at all the antics of the people surrounding him. He was one of the lucky ones to be well received by Atlantis' elite. She felt confident that the young Marine would stay and make a home here.

Jennifer decided to turn the tables on the Colonel and walk him back to his quarters when he was ready. Leaning over she put her head on John's shoulder and drifted off to sleep enjoying the familiar sounds of teasing and bickering exchanged around the table.

oOo

Rodney and Jennifer sat in the canteen finishing off a pitcher of beer and reliving the ordeal they'd endured earlier in the day … spinning their story to anyone who'd listen. Jennifer lavished praises on Rodney for the excellent job he did at getting all of them out of the collapsing mine in one piece. Rodney basked in the limelight soaking in all the attention while finishing off another beer.

Keller and McKay along with Colonel Carter had traveled to M5V-801 to try and convince the settlement to move to a safer location. The planet was very unstable experiencing numerous tremors daily and they seemed to be escalating. The three of them had fallen into an abandoned mine and it took all their skill and a whole lot of luck to get them back out alive.

Jennifer sat earlier on one of the beds in the infirmary having her hands bandaged thinking it'd be nice to have Sheppard around for a little moral support tonight. She seemed all cool and collected on the outside but underneath her professional persona she was a bowl of jelly needing a good cry. It'd been a close call today and had terribly unnerved her. Her friendship with John had deepened over the past months since her capture and rescue from New Athos and he was one of the few friends she had who she'd been able to confide in.

Rodney had sat next to her with his own set of bandages from all the deep rope burns and was ready to lock himself in his room for the next several days and sleep. Jennifer knew she wouldn't be able to sleep for a while and wanted to wait up for Sheppard to return from a short supply mission so she talked McKay into joining her for a drink before he called it a night.

oOo

Sheppard and Ronon returned through the gate around 21:00 hours after delivering some much needed medical supplies to one of their trading partners. They parted company in the gate room with Ronon heading to the dining hall for dinner while Sheppard checked in with the control room to learn the status of the negotiations on M5V-801. Once Major Lorne had briefed him on the outcome of the mission Sheppard headed to the infirmary to check on everyone.

"Hey Sam, how are you feeling?" he asked as he approached her bed.

"Pretty good. I'll be on crutches for a while but I'm not complaining … could have been a lot worse."

"Where are McKay and Keller?"

"Last I heard they were heading for the lounge."

"They doing okay?" he asked hoping he didn't sound overly concerned. He knew they were probably doing well if they hadn't been admitted but he especially wanted to know how Jennifer was doing. Somehow he'd allowed her entry into his daily thoughts. He wasn't sure when exactly it happened but now he gauged his own well being on how the Doc was doing … a matter he intended to examine more thoroughly sometime soon.

"You know McKay … I think he's designing a new action hero in his likeness. Jennifer appears to be taking it all in stride but I'm thinking there's more just under the surface. It was a pretty intense situation there for a while. Wouldn't hurt to check on her."

"I'm heading that way now. Get some sleep Colonel," he added squeezing her hand.

Sheppard swung back around to the control room for a few words with Lorne before declaring himself done for the evening … reminding his Second he'd be on the radio if needed. He made his way to his office to see if there were any messages he needed to deal with before morning and then checked the boards for tomorrow's missions before locking up.

The Colonel never really _shut down_ but he had gone through his mental checklist of duties he performed every night and now he was heading to the lounge.

"Heard you two were hanging out in here," he announced pulling out a chair and nodding to the Lieutenant behind the bar for a glass. "You guys okay … all your fingers and toes?"

"We've been here for a while so I'd say we're feeling better." McKay snorted. Samantha has a broken leg."

"Just saw her and she's resting."

"I'm heading to bed while I can still walk. I'll leave Jennifer with you," he announced pushing his chair in. "I think my debt has been settled," he added bowing slightly to Jennifer.

"What?" Sheppard asked.

"He lost a bet … I'll explain later," she chuckled while pouring him a glass of beer.

"Okay, sounds interesting. Now … didn't I tell you to stay out of trouble?" he growled.

"Believe me, I wish this had never happened," she sighed looking at her hands.

"Do they hurt?' he asked taking hold of one of her bandaged hands.

"Not yet but I'm sure they'll be sore in the morning," she replied before taking her hand back.

"How are you?" he whispered looking her in the eyes so she wouldn't just gloss over her feelings.

"Working through it all … waiting up for you. You always seem to say what I need to hear," she smiled knowing the beer had definitely lowered her inhibitions.

"That's why I get the big bucks," he grinned. "You ready to get out of here … I'll walk you home."

"Okay," she sighed quietly.

John could see the uncertainty in her eyes and hear it in her voice. He knew she was far from okay and shouldn't be alone. "Tell you what … why don't we grab a snack and take it back to my quarters. We can put on a movie and you can fall asleep on my couch." Once the suggestion was made he was rewarded with a small smile and a look of relief. Hopefully he'd get her to talking before she buried it all in some hidden spot where all the bad things reside.

oOo

Sheppard walked out to the gate room balcony unwrapping the cherry sucker he'd stolen from Jennifer's office just as Chuck began the dialing sequence. The CMO was due for her interview with the IOA and not looking forward to it. He watched her smooth down her uniform and tug at her jacket.

"Stop fidgeting," he scolded teasingly. "You'll do fine, besides, you'll have a whole 24 hours to relax on Midway before your interview… there's nothing to be nervous about."

"Let's see how you feel when it's your turn," she growled back, looking up to his perch.

"What's not to love … you'll have them all eating out of your hand."

"I'd better go … see you when I get back."

"Have a good visit with your dad," he added as she neared the gate. _Be safe_, he whispered quietly as the wormhole closed.

oOo

Dr. Lee met Jennifer as she walked down the ramp at the Midway station. After their initial greetings the scientist showed her to her room pointing out the few amenities the station had to offer.

Jennifer settled in her room pulling out her mp3 player and toiletries for the night. Digging a bit deeper in her bag she retrieved a small package she'd stowed along with a bundle of lollypops. Knowing the Colonel loved the red suckers best she'd gathered the last of the cherry treats before leaving Atlantis and tied them into a small bundle. Sitting at the desk she unwrapped the package containing a small antique Ferris wheel she'd ordered a few months back and arranged it on the desk with the suckers. She knew John would be the next person to use the guest room on Midway and hoped he'd be pleased with her little surprise. Once she'd finished her special project she settled on the bed with her ipod and the last of the unsolved Sudoku books that she found in the desk drawer.

She hadn't been excited about the mandatory layover on the space station but was starting to embrace the hours of solitude using most of it to analyze her growing feelings for the Colonel. As often as she'd tried she still couldn't shake the increasing attraction she had for the man and knew if she didn't put a stop to her fantasizing she'd find herself dealing with a lot of heartache.

oOo

Jennifer finished her interview with the IOA by early afternoon having fielded all of Mr. Coolidge's numerous questions. She still couldn't see the necessity of having department heads travel all the way to Earth just to answer a bunch of questions … surely it would have been more efficient to bring the man to Atlantis instead. At least this way she got to visit with her dad for a couple of days.

Finding a quiet corner Jennifer put in a surprise call to her dad only to find the surprise was on her. Seems his new "friendship" with the woman across the street was developing rather quickly and the couple were leaving shortly for an all-inclusive trip to Puerto Rico. She spent most of their conversation reassuring her dad that she was fine and would catch up with him next time she was stateside. Once the connection was broke she found herself lonely and a bit down in the dumps. She hadn't realized how much she was looking forward to spending time at home.

oOo

Jennifer had spent most of the morning at the local mall stocking up on some necessities to take back to Atlantis and introducing Vala to Victoria's Secrets. She enjoyed spending time with the woman and knew it'd give Daniel a bit of a break. Vala would have been a prime candidate for Ritalin during her formative years had it been available to other planets in the Milky Way galaxy. Even so, Jennifer enjoyed her sassy personality and chuckled over her constant need to be entertained.

After stowing all her purchases Jen found herself hungry and headed to the mess hall. At this time of day she knew the dining room would be relatively empty but should still have a variety of things to choose from.

"Hey Doc, come join me," Sheppard called to her from across the room.

"Fancy meeting you here," she laughed taking a seat across from him.

"I thought you'd be in Wisconsin by now filling your dad with tales of work overseas in some unnamed part of the world … what happened?"

"Poor timing … seems he's on a trip to Puerto Rico with a lady friend. We talked for a while on the phone which was nice."

"Yeah, but not the same as a face to face," he added sincerely.

"When do you have your interview?" Jennifer asked.

"Just finished. Thought I'd catch a bite to eat before heading out."

"Oh, by the way … Happy Birthday," she acknowledged shyly. "What do you have planned for the day?"

"First of all … thank you for the gift," he said sincerely. I don't know where you found it but its perfect."

"You're very welcome," she answered shyly. Now … where are you spending the rest of the day?"

"The county fair is going on across town … thought it sounded like fun. When are you heading back to Atlantis?

"I'll probably return tomorrow … no need staying longer when I'd just be killing time here at the SGC."

"Good, you can come with me to the fair … you can't say no, it's my birthday." he insisted.

"Will there be cotton candy and corn on the cob?" she chuckled.

"I'll even include dinner afterwards."

"Sounds perfect … when do we leave?"

oOo

It was early afternoon by the time the pair got to the fairgrounds. They spent the better part of two hours exploring the livestock exhibits moving on to quilts and handwork next. As they neared the Midway, John stopped to buy a bunch of ride tickets as Jennifer waited in line to purchase some cotton candy.

"You were serious about the cotton candy," he chuckled as she pulled another large piece off the spindle.

"Of course," she laughed.

"Hold still," he instructed looking around to hopefully find a napkin near by. When that failed he moved a little closer and ran his thumb over the corner of her mouth softly wiping the gooey candy from her face. Not knowing exactly what to do with the mess on his thumb he slowly put it in his mouth and sucked off the pink sugar crystals. The act was sensual and deliberate and the two stood with their eyes locked together until a woman with an eager pack of children in tow ran into them breaking the spell.

"Okay … I got us some ride tickets," he announced holding up the large wad of red tickets.

"Let me put them in my pack," she offered. Jen couldn't help but wonder if she'd have to go on every ride to use up all he'd purchased.

John took her on rides of every kind even letting her opt out on the roller coaster offering to hold his sunglasses. Just as the lights were starting to come on he talked her into the Scrambler. Sheppard situated himself against the inside edge with Jennifer sitting in the middle. By the end of the ride she was firmly wedged into his side helpless to do anything other than bury her head in his chest. Halfway through her third apology for squishing him she caught the slight grin he was trying to conceal.

"Let's go again," he suggested. "We don't want to waste the tickets I've already bought.

"Once more but then you owe me some corn on the cob," she agreed grinning. Truth be told she didn't mind being smashed against the man innocent or not.

After they feasted on the hot corn and played a few games in the carnival area Sheppard finally approached the whole reason for dragging her to the fair. It was dark and getting toward the end of the evening and he was determined to get her to ride the Ferris wheel with him.

"So… how are you doing? Do you want to rest your feet for a while?" he suggested.

"That's a great idea," she agreed. "Do you want to get a snack or something to drink?"

"I have a better idea … how bout a ride on the Ferris wheel?" he asked innocently. "It will be my birthday present."

"I think I already covered that at the Midway station," she said chuckling.

"Yes … and it was a perfect gift I might add in case I haven't thanked you yet," he laughed.

"Only a dozen times but who's counting," she beamed. "But the Ferris wheel, I'm not sure."

"How bout we take a walk and just look at it," he suggested furrowing his forehead.

"I guess that can't hurt … I know how much you love this ride so I'm more than willing to wait for you too."

The last thing the man wanted was for her to wave to him from the ground. No, he needed her sitting beside him so if he had to beg he was prepared to grovel until she agreed.

OOo

"Colonel, I don't think I can do this. I'm kind of awful with heights … the whole inner ear, vertigo thing," she stuttered while craning her neck to see the top of the structure.

"You'll be fine … I've always looked out for you, right."

"Well, yes … but it's really up there. Maybe we should talk about this first?"

"Okay … let's get something to drink and consider the whole situation. You do remember it's my birthday … right?"

"So how long are you going to milk that?"

"As long as it takes," he replied with his little boy grin.

John led them over to the beer gardens, which sported a great view of the Ferris wheel and ordered a couple bottles of beer and a basket of peanuts. He was determined to talk Jen into sharing his favorite ride with him if it took all night.

"So Colonel … what's with the fascination with Ferris wheels?"

"When I was eight years old my mom took me to the state fair and there was this huge Ferris wheel … it looked higher than anything I'd ever seen. I begged her the whole day to let me take a ride and finally when we were on our way out to the parking lot she gave in. I think she planned on taking me all day but knew it would be more spectacular at night," he explained affectionately.

"But what was so extraordinary about a carnival ride that would stay with you for so long?"

"I remember sitting at the very top looking out over the town filled with lights and color and wanting to stay there all night. When the ride started its downward journey I closed my eyes and stretched my arms out letting the breeze blow my hair … it felt like I was sailing among the stars. I think that was the most defining moment in my life … definitely established my love of flying."

Jennifer was captivated as he shared his most personal memories. She'd watched him closely over the past months … looking beyond the quirky hair and sexy swagger. He'd shown himself to be a man of fierce loyalty and determined drive … a commanding presence on Atlantis. His passions were deep and lasting and would forever be the man she'd measure others by.

"So … you need to share just one more ride with me to celebrate my birthday," he pleaded with a furrowed brow.

"How about we walk back over and let me take another look?"

Jen dug into the small pack she'd been carrying all day to see if they needed more tickets. Finding a whole handful she realized she couldn't use that for an excuse. Sighing deeply she decided to suck it up and try to swallow her fears … at least it wasn't a roller coaster he had his heart set on.

"Wow … that's a long ways up," she exclaimed as they stood at the fence surrounding the ride. "I thought I could do this but I'm not so sure now."

"Come on Doc, you've faced down bigger threats than this."

"Okay … but I'm not sure I'll be able to get my mind off how high we are off the ground," she said sarcastically.

"I promise you I can keep your mind off of it or I'll buy dinner … your choice of restaurant," Sheppard declared, putting his plan in motion. After spending all day with the woman he knew it was time to find out how she felt about him. He couldn't think of a better place to declare himself than at the top of a Ferris wheel.

John took her hand leading her around to the other side joining several other couples that were in line for the next ride. Waiting their turn he could feel the slight tremor in her fingers and felt a bit guilty at forcing her to do something so far out of her comfort zone. But if he pulls this off it'll be worth it.

Jennifer stood chewing on her bottom lip staring anxiously at the dwindling line knowing it was almost her turn. If she didn't care so much for John she'd have refused from the get-go but now all she wanted to do was make his birthday perfect and if that involved plunging several hundred feet to her death then so be it.

As they approached the ride attendant Jennifer pulled the roll of tickets out of her pack and looked at the operator questioningly.

"That'll be four tickets each … how many rides do you want?"

"You've got to be kidding me," she mumbled under her breath. "Just one, please."

They both took seats on the next car letting the attendant secure the bar across their laps. "Where are the seat belts?" Jennifer asked anxiously looking from side to side.

"Will you relax … come here," he ordered, putting his arm around her and pulling her in close. "You're not going to fall out."

"I am going to pick the most expensive restaurant I can find … and we will be having dessert and alcohol … lots and lots of alcohol!" she demanded.

"You haven't won yet so don't get too set on your choices. I'm pretty sure they don't sell alcohol in the commissary," he teased.

Before she could say another word the car began to move sending the couple higher and higher off the ground. Half way up Jennifer made the mistake of looking down … inhaling sharply she threw herself into Sheppard's chest and closed her eyes.

"Did you look down?" he asked puzzled.

"Yes!" she growled.

"I told you not to look down," he chuckled, tucking her head under his chin.

She slowly relaxed listening to his heartbeat as he rubbed her arm. This part of the ride she was starting to enjoy. Who wouldn't want to be safely planted in the arms of Lt. Colonel John Sheppard?

"Now … this isn't so bad is it?"

"As long as I don't have to open my eyes. Just so you know … I'm pretty sure I've won the bet – my mind is imagining what the ground looks like from way up here."

After they'd made several loops between the earth and the heavens the attendant began stopping at each car and helping the occupants exit the ride. Slowly their car rose higher and higher in the sky heading for the top.

"Jennifer, I want you to sit up and look at me," John asked.

"Are we done already?" she asked relieved. Reluctantly, she pulled away from John and opened her eyes expecting to be back on solid ground.

"Look at me … now, I want you to look out at the lights," he said holding her chin so she couldn't look down.

"I'd rather look at you," she whispered. Taking a moment, she summoned the courage to pull her attention away from John's face and look at the wondrous sight around her. "This is so beautiful," she confirmed, breathlessly looking out at the city beneath her and the stars above.

Just as she was relaxing in the moment the car began to move and she was once again drawn to the ground and regretting the last ten minutes of her life. No sooner had they gotten started than it abruptly stopped causing her to feel like she was hanging over the edge of a cliff. This must be what it feels like to be totally out of control she thought.

"How long will it take to get this ride over with?" she asked desperately.

"Shhh… take a deep breath," he instructed. John took his arm from around her, and then holding her arms he pulled her in kissing her softly just as the car began moving again.

What began as a slow and purposeful inquiry soon snowballed moving them into uncharted territory. The cars continued to stop and start as they made their way toward solid ground yet neither of them noticed anything save the pleasures of each other's touch. By the time they'd reached the ground Jennifer's hair looked as wild as his and the couple waiting for their car had suggested they _get a room_.

"Okay you two love birds … the ride's over," the operator explained, laughing.

Jennifer rummaged through her pack pulling out eight tickets and handing them over, "We'll go again," she declared, smiling.

John pulled her in for another kiss as the car once again began its upward climb. Few things in life moved him like the joy of flying … somehow this incredible woman pushed the same buttons and he planned on making a career of her too.


End file.
